Jesus is the King of Israel.
He came to save his people from their sins.
Who are his people? Israelites?
Israelites wrote the various books of the Bible.
Of the twelve apostles, only Paul was sent to the Gentiles.
Paul told Gentiles how to become Israelites.
Gentiles took Paul's works and assembled the Bible.
Then they created the Gentile Church, ... and scorned the name of Israel.
My mind is continually piecing "the puzzle" together. Automatically.
Introverted Intuition.
Intuitive Logic.
All behind the scenes; nobody knows it's happening, unless they realize what my silence and my staring off into the distance means.
In addition, The Holy Spirit is often in there giving me clues and guiding me, provided I am listening to Him.
I have a special friend and we have developed a deep relationship. She has a similar personality to my wife's, but is more of an adventurer than a shopper. I'm one of her walking buddies and we enjoy talking while listening to music in the park, at least when that activity is available in the Summer.
I took the photograph of the "twin oaks" when she and I were enjoying one of those music events.
She moved to Midland a few years ago because one of her daughters lives here. Her daughter is the wife of a pastor, and his church sponsors missionaries and missions to spread The Good News about Yehoshua. It is the same church my wife and I were members of two decades ago.
Unlike many people in my town, my friend listens to me. She is from another state. Isn't that interesting? She is also a recent widow.
I told her about my love interest right up front, and my dreams about India. She is fascinated and we often discuss it. She knows I need to express myself, as she needs to talk about the things going on in her life.
She typically does not read much and usually knits when we are together, but she acquired a particular book from her son-in-law's church and she devoured it. Then she loaned it to me and encouraged me to read it.
The book is the faith testimony of a Muslim man who found Jesus.
The author used to be very legalistic and was taught the world must be converted to Islam. He went to Afghanistan as a mujahid and did the kinds of things a mujahid would do, although he did not go into details. He saw Christians as his enemy, until God changed him.
He came to realize the Quran is not in conflict with the New Testament, as he had been told. It confirms it! This allowed him to accept the forgiveness that comes through Yehoshua while still identifying as a Muslim. He learned faith in Yehoshua has nothing to do with culture.
My friend saw a parallel between that man's situation and potentially my Hindu Twin-Flame's, and that is why she wanted me to read the book. For the same reason, I also consumed it.
As the puzzle of my life and mission comes together in my mind, I am realizing faith and culture must be disentangled in order for biblical faith to multiply on the Indian Subcontinent. This will be "the margin of victory."
I know it sounds trite, but God does work in amazing ways!
He said to them, “Go into all the world and preach the gospel to all creation. Whoever believes and is baptized will be saved, but whoever does not believe will be condemned. And these signs will accompany those who believe: In my name they will drive out demons; they will speak in new tongues; they will pick up snakes with their hands; and when they drink deadly poison, it will not hurt them at all; they will place their hands on sick people, and they will get well.” (Mark 16:15-18 NIV)
Go into all the world
That means go where the Holy Spirit sends us, leads us and confirms to us where we should be. It probably means going to someplace else. That's what all of his guys did.
We are to follow their example. That is our job.
Preach the gospel
That means proclaim the Good News (gospel, a religious term) about salvation and new life through Ye-HO-shu-a Ha-ma-SHEE-ach (Jesus the Christ or Messiah, King of Israel), and everything else the Bible teaches.
Whoever believes and is baptized (by immersion, like Jesus was) will be saved Whoever does not believe will be condemned
Our own belief is required.
Our own baptism is part of the job. It is not necessary for salvation, according to this text, but we aren't going to get much done without it. (Other places in the Bible say it is required for forgiveness of sins. Acts 2:38 is one of those places.)
These signs will accompany those who believe
In other words, if the following things are not happening, then logically we do not believe.
And if we do not believe then we are not saved.
Consequently, it is crucial we make an effort to do these things.
If we attempt to do these things, we will see them happen. If we don't, we won't.
If we see them happen, our belief will increase and we will become more confident.
If we become more confident, we will want to do these things more.
If we do these things more, we will bear much fruit. Fruit that will last.
In my (Yehoshua's, i.e. Jesus') name they will drive out demons
Jesus did it. His guys did it. We must do it.
Getting rid of demons is job one (1). It is listed first.
If infiltrators are allowed to remain embedded and entrenched, they are going to interfere with our work and we will accomplish nothing of eternal value. We will not be able to bear good fruit, fruit that will last.
Demons can be driven out with a single word (Matthew 8:32). We have the authority to do it. We must exercise that authority and power.
We must learn to value the man or woman who was made in the image of God and distinguish between them and the bondages and infirmities that plague and imprison them. Demons can be the cause of such things. Demons are not people. Having a demon, or demons, is not shameful. We are all susceptible to them.
Demons can affect our behaviors and beliefs. Getting rid of demons will give us clear minds and perspectives.
Jesus can fix all of our problems.
And he will do it through his people during this period of time. He is sitting next to the Father and intercedes for us as we do our work.
They will speak in new tongues
In other words, we will do many miraculous things when following Jesus through the Holy Spirit.
They will pick up snakes with their hands
In other words, we will not be afraid. God will be with us to protect us and to demonstrate his authority and power through us.
When they drink deadly poison, it will not hurt them at all
The opposition will be powerless to oppose us. They can try, but they will fail.
They will place their hands on sick people, and they will get well
God will miraculously change people's lives through us, and it will cause those people to listen to our message and perhaps become believers themselves.
Jesus heals all sicknesses and diseases.
What part of "all" do you not understand?
Doing the above things is our job.
Nowhere in the Bible does Jesus say, "Go to church." It's not there.
Justifying our own behavior does not change that fact.
Some Bible translations convey doubt about the origins of this last part of Mark. In my opinion, the Darkness has done what it can to keep important and clear instructions from people by interfering with the stewardship of important and clear sections of God's Word.
But, God is sovereign and infinitely greater than any potential interference with His purposes.
08:29 If you're the feminine pole of the dynamic, you probably feel an attraction that's both magnetic and selective. You don't feel attracted to just anyone, but when you connect with your Twin Flame the attraction is total, enveloping, as if every cell in your body recognized that energy. You also may feel an intense need to merge, to dissolve boundaries, to become one person with them...
10:00 If you're the masculine pole of the dynamic, you may feel an attraction that's more focused, more directed, like a laser beam aimed at that specific person. You may feel a certainty that they're "the one," even when they're being inconsistent or confusing towards you. You may also feel impulses to protect them, to be strong for them, to create stability so they can flourish. If you're the masculine pole, you probably have more ease maintaining your individuality, even when deeply connected. You can love intensely but don't lose yourself in the process. And when the feminine pulls away or creates drama, you may feel confused, but not destroyed. You can maintain a relatively stable emotional base even in relational turbulence.
Every circle was a line Just connected by design Every part of this reminding me How your heart met mine And every time, when
You want I will take you home And you'll play with the radio
I need you to know You are the only one that I'll ever love Just look what's been done Two hearts beat as one It's never easy but the two are now one Just look what's been done Two hearts beat as one I know; oh, you know
If the heart is heaven Tell me, would the mind then be hell? And if I get too heavy for you Let me know 'cause I can't tell The jar and bell, well
If you want I can take you home And we'll sing to the radio
I need you to know You are the only one that I'll ever love Just look what's been done Two hearts beat as one It's never easy but the two are now one Just look what's been done Two hearts beat as one I know; oh, you know
I will never need again I am infinite I won't forget the moment I felt the whole earth cave in love Two hearts...
You just sing and I'll take you home I'll take you home, now I need you to know I need you to know now
You are the only one that I'll ever love Just look what's been done Two hearts beat as one I know, it's never easy but the two are now one Just look what's been done Two hearts beat as one I know; oh, you know
The potential emotional stakes are unimaginably high.
People who have problems with self-confidence, those who have been damaged by rejection and betrayal, those who have lost in love and are familiar with that suffering, instinctively shy away.
Even though they unavoidably love you to the depths of their soul, even though their very DNA, their cellular code, is screaming your name --- fear of rejection, fear of loss, fear of fear itself --- typically drives one Twin to flee.
This person is known as The Runner. They run, even when there is no other person involved... (AVR #5797, "Anchor Points")
I know you are scared. I know you were shocked when you received my letter, probably on April 24. I know you have been processing a lot.
I know this is almost too much for you.
But I know you are strong and you can work through this. We can work through it together. And, it will be fun.
I would like to move my communications with you to something private. I know this whole thing has been Divinely inspired and it is being used to impact other people, but this morning I sense a shift.
It's time.
Relationships must be built through intimate, in-person communications. Body language and verbal expression provide the vast amount of information; spoken words only account for about 5%. Text messaging is a lousy way to communicate anything except arranging rendezvous.
My conditions are gone. They have been melted away.
Do I care that you are a Hindu? No. I am curious about what you know and have learned.
Am I concerned about whether or not we are "equally yoked?" No. This is God's project and He will work out what needs to be worked out.
Do I care about what men, women and the world think? No. I know that my Redeemer lives and that He is in full control. He is my Judge; no other.
Do I care about your feelings, concerns, constraints, preferences, desires, comforts, dreams, relationships, goals, purpose in life, and your opinions? Absolutely!
That is why we must get together and talk about things.
I have been learning how to develop relationships, and I have developed a lot of them since I lost my love and best friend. I have lots of loves now, and I have been learning to love unconditionally.
I believe this has all been preparation for meeting you, and I am eager to get on with my life.
I do not know what is ahead, but I am full of joy and anticipation.
The feminine principal is receptive but not passive; it's choosing but not pursuing; it's magnetic but not aggressive. It's like the earth that chooses which seeds it will allow to germinate in its soil. The earth doesn't chase after seeds begging to be fertilized. It simply offers or denies its conditions for life to sprout, and when it offers its ideal conditions the seeds naturally turn toward it, surrender to it, find in it the perfect home to flourish. The masculine principal on the other hand is directed, focused, penetrating. It's like the sun that offers its light constantly without pursuing; without begging to be accepted. It simply shines with its authentic truth and allows the earth to choose whether it wants to receive that light, or not. And when the earth opens to receive, when it offers fertile soil, the sun naturally pours over it with all its intensity.
When these principals operate in harmony, when each is in its natural energetic role, attraction happens organically, effortlessly, without resistance, but when roles are reversed, when the feminine tries to be the pursuing sun and the masculine tries to be the resisting earth, the dynamic becomes forced, unbalanced, usually doomed to failure or co-dependency.
...modern society ... has ... taught that women should chase men, that they should be active, aggressive, that they should conquer; and it taught men to be more passive, more receptive, less directed. This polarity inversion has created entire generations of people who no longer know how to relate in an energetically-balanced way. And when it comes to twin flames, this polarity confusion becomes even more destructive because twin flames are connections that operate at much higher and more subtle frequencies than common relationships. Any energetic imbalance in this dynamic creates resistances that can last years, decades, sometimes entire lifetimes.
Jung observed in his therapy sessions that ... the soul that carries more feminine energy in the dynamic is always the one that defines whether union will happen, or not. (From the video, below.)
The feminine has to decide to change, but how does she do that?
I am certain the Creator of the universe brought my twin flame into the coffee shop and that she recognized me, but not consciously. She chose and I aligned. We were allowed to sample each other and experience the promise, but it was only that, a promise.
I have been taken through so much over the past year. I have grown and matured, and the common denominator has been her. Every day; every night; every awakening. It's always her, and what God ultimately plans to do with us.
He has given me so much guidance and revelation about this and I have realized I am sinning when I doubt. I have no excuse because I know His Voice, and He does not lie or mislead. He does not tease. I have asked Him to take it away if my interpretations are not His intentions; my thoughts about her have simply intensified.
I had a deep and loving relationship with my wife that grew over time.1 Through my grief over losing her I have learned how to rely on myself and to walk with my Creator. He is my Master and He guides me through my life.
I fully comprehend and expect God is working on my twin flame, too. She is much younger than me and I realize the strategic importance of that fact. I trust my Yehoshua and know He is showing me His heart so He can include me in the courting of the Love of His life, the Spiritual Children of Israel.
I am impatient, of course. It has been 1733 days since I last made love with a woman; 1731 since I embraced her. I crave relationship, ...intensely. My twin flame is the only option my Creator has brought before me. There is no other. There will be no other. I am certain of it.
But I will wait patiently. She is at a crucial point in her life, the same age I was when my spiritual growth and revelations took off. She must be independent and sovereign, confident she can navigate through the rest of her life on her own with only the help of her Maker. When she is at the right point, the LORD will bring us together. Not a moment before. Then we will be massively more than the sum of our parts.
Our situation is unique, just like every twin-flame relationship, but the principles of these videos apply and we can both learn from them. Here is the one that was put in front of me today...
I am working on reconciling what I know with these "Twin Flame" ideas. Perhaps this is part of the work I must do before union can take place?
UPDATE, August 9, 2026...
I believe I'm an "Embracer." From the Pure Twin Flames website...
Embracers
Some of these twin flames have made more spiritual progress throughout their lives. They’ll be more in touch with their inner truth.
It’s likely their spiritual growth will show in their 3D life. These twins will be the wise friend everyone goes to for advice.
They’re usually radiating energy on the frequencies of balance. They display higher vibe emotions, behaviors, and thinking patterns.
You can count on them to be optimistic, open-minded, willing, and eager to communicate authentically. A powerful characteristic of these twins is their deep respect for someone else’s space and divine timing.
These so-called chasers feel connected at a more consciously aware level to their twin. The prospect of an intense relationship with them comes as a relief they welcome into their lives.
They know they’re going to reunite when the time is right. It’s not the lack of mentality that drives them, but the abundance of unconditional love. The driving force behind them embracing the path comes from the point of balance and spiritual growth.
They’re entering the surrender stage and embracing the journey. This manifestation of a union is the one likelier to lead to the end of the separation phase, especially when the so-called chaser was the Divine Feminine energy. (https://puretwinflames.com/twin-flame-characteristics/. Emphasis in original.)
UPDATE, August 10, 2026...
I've been meditating and thinking about the above article concerning characteristics. The last paragraph linking an Embracer with the feminine pole was what caught my attention overnight.
When we talk about these twin flame characteristics, gender plays no role in the equation. Divine energies are not related to gender at all. Sure, it can happen that a female twin flame plays a Divine Feminine role in the connection at one point or overall. Or the male twin flame could play a Divine Masculine role. But it can also be the other way around.
And anyone, regardless of their gender or how they identify, has both Divine Feminine and Divine Masculine energies in their soul and energetic body.
The roles are not about gender, and they’re not fixed. Energy is the essence of life, and it’s always fluid. Twin flame energy always changes, adapts, and grows. The same twin can play alternating roles during the same human experience or as part of various lifetimes.
The roles influence how the two souls interact and harmonize in order to achieve divine union. It’s all about how they help each other to achieve the merging stage. (Emphasis added.)
I am also okay with the adjective "divine" because we are God's creation and we are made in his image. When I say, "God," I am referring to the God of the Bible.
I remain skeptical about various lifetimes because I do not see that concept in the Bible. I believe we all get a single shot at this.2
One of the things that concerns me about Hinduism is the belief in multiple lifetimes and reincarnation.
The practice of Sati encourages women to kill themselves.
The thread in the Aaj Ki Raat (From "Don") music video where the man is poisoned and then drinks more poison to kill himself seems to stem from his presumed belief that he will reincarnate after he dies.
I believe that prevarication leads many people to tragically give up their own lives, which is just what the Darkness wants.
Now, the main reason I am making this update is, as of this morning, I believe I am currently the "feminine pole" of our dynamic and you are the "masculine pole." Reading through the characteristics of each and the characteristics of both the chaser and runner, I don't think our respective poles line up with our physical genders. And, according to the article, that's okay!
You came after me, and then you ran. I am older and have had more time and experiences to come to grips with spiritual matters. And the "Bike" story I wrote and have published on the private blog I made for you alone fits this polarity arrangement and continues to make me smile. (You'll really like it!)
This all lines up with my identification with the "Embracer" characteristics.
I hope you are transitioning into a "Postponer." Perhaps this is why you have been led to spend time in India with people who comprehend Hindu ideas, which are going to be more in line with Twin Flame phenomena than the ideas of people here in Central Michigan.
Yesterday, I was led to visit the church I left twenty years ago. Not much had changed. It was a big box containing people with ideas consistent with certain teachings, some of them true and some of them missing important components. I yearned for you the whole time I was there.
UPDATE, August 27, 2026...
If I am the feminine pole of the dynamic, then the following text applies to me.
From the second video of the original post, above...
15:40 How do you make this transition from pursuit to sovereignty? How do you stop chasing without becoming cold or indifferent? How do you choose yourself without closing your heart to the connection? These are practical questions that Jung addressed through specific inner work techniques.
The first step is developing what Jung called "the self-observation function," the ability to observe your own emotional and behavioral patterns without judgement. You need to start noticing when you're operating from lack versus when you're operating from abundance. Lack manifests as urgency, as need for immediate response, as tendency to interpret silence as rejection. Abundance manifests as natural patience, as ability to give space, as confidence that what's true always finds a way to manifest.
The second step is learning to distinguish between love and attachment. Love is an expansive force that wants the best for the other regardless of how it affects you. Attachment is a possessive force that wants the other in a specific way to satisfy your needs. When you truly love, you can desire for the person to be happy, even if it's not with you. When you're attached, you can only imagine their happiness if it includes you.
The third step is developing a consistent practice of internal fulfillment. This means creating sources of joy, fulfillment and love that don't depend on any specific person. It can be art, nature, spirituality, meaningful work, deep friendships, any activity that connects you with your own essence and makes you feel alive through yourself.
The fourth step is learning to establish healthy energetic boundaries. This means stopping molding yourself to please, stopping suppressing your truth to avoid conflicts, stopping making yourself emotionally available to those who don't demonstrate consistent reciprocity, not out of revenge or manipulation but from basic self-respect.
And the fifth step, perhaps most important, is cultivating an intimate and loving relationship with your own company, learning to enjoy yourself alone, comfort yourself in difficult moments, celebrate yourself in victories, forgive yourself in mistakes. When you become your own best friend and dearest company, you stop desperately seeking these functions in other people.
Jung understood this process doesn't happen overnight. It's a journey of months, or even years, depending on how deep the co-dependency patterns you've developed throughout life are. But each small step in this direction changes your energetic frequency perceptibly, not just for you but for all people around you. And here's where the real magic happens when you finally establish yourself in this inner sovereignty, when you stop chasing your Twin Flame and start living your own life fully, two things can happen.
The first is they may awaken to what they lost and start chasing you with the same intensity you used to chase them.
The second is you may discover you no longer need them to feel complete, and this discovery opens space for even more evolved and mature connections.
In both cases, you win. Either you reclaim your Twin Flame from a position of power and wholeness, creating solid foundation for truly conscious relationship, or you discover you're capable of attracting and sustaining connections even more aligned with who you've become through this growth process.
But regardless of external outcome, the real prize is always internal. You reclaim your own soul. You stop living on the periphery of another person's life and become protagonist of your own story again. You stop begging for "love crumbs" and become inexhaustible source of love for yourself and the world. Jung said that the final goal of human existence isn't finding our other half, but becoming whole through ourselves.
Twin Flames, according to this perspective, don't come to complete us, but to awaken us to our own wholeness. Mutual recognition serves as mirror where each soul can see itself reflected in its totality, but the work of becoming that totality is always individual and non-transferrable. When the divine feminine finally gets tired and decides to stop chasing, it's not giving up on love. It's finally choosing true love, starting with itself. It's deciding it deserves to be chosen by someone who recognizes it naturally, not by someone who needs to be convinced of its worth. It's opting to be magnetic through its own light, not needy through its own lack, and this choice, even when made in silence within one's own heart has power to transform not just your personal life, but the energetic dynamic of all people around you, because when a person truly establishes themselves in their inner sovereignty, they become living inspiration that it's possible to love without losing yourself, connect without abandoning yourself, desire without becoming desperate. [Emphasis added.]
I believe this has all been going on with me, especially the highlighted parts.
Yes, I am the feminine pole of the dynamic. What does that mean for our relationship and how do I adjust what I am doing?
I experience reality in layers. There is the layer of physical gender; the layer of biblical principles; the layer of energetic dynamics. It's all beginning to make some sense.
UPDATE, August 28, 2026...
2 Here is a specific biblical reference about this concept...
Just as people are destined to die once, and after that to face judgment, ... (Hebrews 9:27 NIV, emphasis added)
I knew what your purpose was for being in Midland and knew you would be leaving soon.
I knew you wanted to keep things private and did my best to honor that desire.
There was no betrayal. You imagined that.
If you wanted to end things, you should have said so.
But you didn't.
Cutting off all communications (for a year) was very hurtful. It was cruel. Friends don't do that. They talk things out. Needing space and giving space is normal and fine.
"Ghosting" is unhealthy for all concerned. It is a horrible and destructive behavior that has become far, far too common in our culture. It is unacceptable.
I would like to be friends. Friends talk. Friends get to know each other. Friends care about each other and do things to build up their relationship.
You know how to get in touch with me and where to find me.
I dearly hope to hear from you soon.
😊
UPDATE, September 12, 2025...
I believe this was your goal and why you ran away:
Desiring me was diametrically opposed to your mission and you realized you had "sinned" by entertaining those desires. You had to get back on "the higher path."
I am not going to judge you. If you find happiness by meditating and seeking The Divine, that is your choice. I do not believe it will ultimately work, but you need to explore those things for yourself.
My mind is not trapped by my desire for you. Our mutual friend in the coffee shop says you have been very good for me. I am not angry, far from it. Through you I have become more enlightened and have learned a lot.
I would like to continue our friendship and talk about these things, like we did. I know more about it now and can more intelligently consider your perspectives. I think we are more aligned in our thinking than you may realize.
Please text me. I still have your ringtones on my phone and hearing your text notification sound would absolutely thrill and delight me. 😊
... And I still mean and stand by what I said.
UPDATE, September 13, 2025...
I recently acquired a new hat from a budding entrepreneur in the mall where the coffee shop is located. Uncharacteristically, I took a "selfie" photo wearing the hat and posted the photo as my profile picture on Facebook. That resulted in 20 "likes" and one "heart" (21 total), so friends and relatives seemed to enjoy it.
This morning I realized that hat is a "social mask," which explains why I have not been comfortable wearing it.
I liked square dancing in Sixth Grade, but I wouldn't admit it.
There was the long, dark hair that swayed in the hallway in Seventh Grade.
There was also the Secret Admirer who was apparently in my Homemaking Class. (Yes, I took that, and the girls took Shop.) She and her friends put notes in my locker, teepeed my house, and repeatedly called our telephone, hanging up at all hours of the day and night, ...when my grandfather was on his death-bed in Iowa. My parents were not amused, nor was I. She eventually revealed herself and several years later we were both at the same house-party/kegger. We talked. She said that I must have hated her. I told her no, and that I forgave her.
There was my high-school crush that I never acted upon, but wish I had. Lesson learned.
There was the sister of one of my best friends. She demonstrated several times that she liked me, quite boldly in some ways. I believe she was my first kiss. When she was ready I was not; and when I was ready she was entertaining pursuit from others. We always seemed to be on different trajectories. She came to my parent's house on Christmas Day and she was beautiful. My girlfriend and eventual wife was also there, and that was the last time I saw her. Lesson learned.
There was the girl who was a new chemical engineer and had just moved to Midland. One of my volleyball buddies knew her and she needed help moving into her apartment, which was in the same complex as mine. I went to help, and she was really cute; and interesting. I went back. We liked to talk and I told her about my hometown. I asked her out, and we went to an outdoor concert. I asked her out again and we rode our bikes to Sanford Lake for the day. It was July 4th. We swam in the lake together, and then went to the fireworks that evening. We had ridden our bikes, so we were able to bypass the line of cars leaving the fairgrounds. Then we went back to my apartment, ...and she misunderstood my intentions. She left. I didn't call. She briefly saw me in the apartment complex and asked me where I had been. I was too embarrassed to pursue it, and had realized we really weren't right for each other. We were both engineers and were probably too much alike. Lessons learned.
There was the singer at my childhood friend's wedding. She had a gorgeous voice and sang some solos. As I watched her, I decided she was the one for me during that evening and that wedding. I don't recall anything about the situation, except that I drove her home to where she was staying, at the bride's parents' house. In the car, in the driveway, I accomplished my mission, and she liked it. She was really pretty. Lesson learned.
After my wife died, I spent eleven (11) months in isolation. I needed that time alone and had begun reading about things that led to me acquiring my Cooler Hat. I wanted to find someone in Midland who was also pursuing those things, and heard about a particular woman through someone my sister knew. She was going to hold an introductory teaching session at a particular place in the local mall. I put it on my wall calendar.
The day before the session, I needed to get some things at a store in the mall, and while I was there I realized I needed to find the location of the meeting. The mall was not doing very well financially and there were no directories of the various stores at the entrances, like there used to be. I had to wander around to search for the venue, and eventually stumbled upon the coffee shop I have mentioned numerous times on this blog.
12/8 --> 11; 12/8/2021 --> 16 --> 7
The next day, I arrived in time for the meeting at 1:30 PM and sat at a table by myself where I could assess the situation. I did not know who I was looking for, but there was a woman with a laptop and some books sitting in the back of the shop. I waited. Soon, a few more women showed up and joined her, and I concluded they were the group, but I decided to cancel my plan. She was teaching beginners and I did not want to disrupt her presentation by being a know-it-all and hijacking her agenda. Besides, I had been approached by another woman who was working as a volunteer barista in the coffee shop and we talked about my bereavement and some people we both knew.
Dec 8, 2021
Her shift was over at 2:00 PM, but she continued to talk with me for a bit. After she left, I noticed who had replaced her behind the counter. I talked with that woman, too.
The movie my wife and I watched after eating dessert at Ruthie's was Dan in Real Life. In that movie, one of Dan's adolescent daughters is in love, but he does not approve. He thinks she is too young and what she is experiencing is "not love." She passionately disagrees and rebels against his authority.
Okay, Dad, I ... I love Marty.
Oh, please...
Dad, Dad, .. Dad, Dad, stop. Will you just listen? I didn't know right away. It took me a while.
What's "a while?"
Well, I've known him for three weeks, but I knew in three days.
Three days?! You can't know in three days!
[Seventeen-year-old older sister]: Well, maybe she can.
No, no, no! What you're feeling is not love. It is young, ... and reckless, .. and not thought out.
I love him! I love him! I love him!
You may think it's love, .. but it is not.
I love him! I love him!
No, it's not!
I love him! I love him!
No, it's not!
I love him! I love him!
This "three days" is a theme throughout the movie.
Dan has been widowed for four years, and he meets Marie. After three days, Dan realizes he is in love with Marie. His girls tell him...
Then go get her.
I have watched that movie well over one hundred times.
Several days after my first visit to the coffee shop, my sister and brother-in-law, and their two dogs, visited and stayed at my house for two nights. Right after they left during the afternoon of Wednesday the 15th, I was strongly prompted to go back to the coffee shop. It was around 2 PM. I talked with the woman I had seen behind the counter and had never met anyone like her before. She wore her faith on her sleeve and spoke very openly about it. And, she was very pretty. My urgent question was, "Who are you??!"
I could tell she was definitely younger than me, but how much younger I did not
know. And she was not wearing a ring1, one of the first things I looked
for. I learned we have many things in common, the main thing being our faith. She told me she regularly worked there on Wednesdays and Fridays at 2 PM.
I went back for a third time on Friday and finally got to talk with her for three hours after closing time. I had to know more about her. No woman that pretty would remain unclaimed, and by the time we finished our discussion I had my answer.
One of the themes in my blog is the subject of remarriage after divorce, and it is motivated by this situation. Ever since that third encounter, I have known where I stand. I can be friends with this woman and can develop a deep relationship with her, but intimacy is off the table. The coffee shop is about developing deep relationships with people, and that is what this woman taught me to do. Even though she left Midland nearly eleven (11) months ago, I have continued to develop relationships with other people, both inside and outside the coffee shop, thanks to her.
My wife and I did not understand each other's personalities, but we loved each other and made it work. We were a powerful and effective team because we were different. My coffee shop friend and I have personality types that are "advisors" to each other. When I learned that, I was overjoyed because it explained everything. I have learned so much from her.
It should be apparent from reading this blog that I believe apparent "coincidences" are actually God's fingerprints as He leads us through our lives. I have learned this lesson by looking back at my experiences over the years. God makes known the end from the beginning. I watched Dan in Real Life repeatedly as I grieved in 2021, and the final line of the movie is...
Plan to be surprised.
I am still in love with my wife, and always will be, but God intends for me to move on. That is why there is a grieving process. I really, really, really, really, really, really, really liked being married. The "fringe benefits" are nice, but companionship is what I miss the most. My bride was older than me, and that had its risks and consequences. As an INTJ, I always think about the possibilities, and having a younger companion would certainly open up opportunities for excitement and adventure.
When I realized the Holy Spirit was pointing at this woman, I exclaimed, "Don't tease me!" He replied...
I don't tease.
She and I have had our disagreements and misunderstandings, but working through those things is a part of life. Lessons learned.
I believe God wants to use a relationship He is building between us to teach others about His intentions and standards concerning marriage and relationships between a man and a woman. I believe demonstrating a deep, loving and respectful relationship that does not involve marriage or intimacy can shine light into the darkness of our culture.
I was trying to do that with my wife, but He took her away. God's ways are not our ways.
All glory to God.
UPDATE, October 7, 2023...
UPDATE, October 8, 2023...
People do crazy things when...
I checked out the DVD from the Grace A. Dow Memorial Library through MeLCat, but decided I would like to have my own copy. I think I'm going to watch this movie a lot.
It's pretty pricey because the film has no overall worldwide distributor for Home Media. I got the last one. Hopefully, delivery will work out and the quality will be good.
UPDATE, October 10, 2023...
I have to add one other amazing "coincidence." My coffee shop friend arrived in Midland on the same day my wife and I went to the condominium in Antrim County (Ruthie's) and watched Dan in Real Life.
9/7 --> 16 --> 7; 9/7/2020 --> 20 --> 2 👥
You can't make this stuff up!
See why I like her? 😃
UPDATE, October 12, 2023...
This is used as the love theme in the movie.3 It may be a bit 🌽y, but I think the lyrics are particularly applicable to our situation. God is so hilarious! 🤣
3) You are rare. We are rare. Intuitives are rare, and the majority of people in the world do not understand us, but we understand each other. Embrace this.
4) Let others do what they do best, and cherish the gifts they bring.
At the risk of causing irritation by citing impersonal data, ...
INFJ = my spiritual sibling (1 in every 67 people.)
As the chart shows, we are rare.
I am just amazed at how God orchestrates things, down to the finest detail.
UPDATE, October 25, 2023...
The One I am ultimately in love with is The LORD. He is the one who dumps all of the Four-Drachma Coins into my lap. He is the one who brought her to Midland in his precise timing. And He is the one she is in love with, too.
My spiritual sibling was very frustrated with me the other day, and she let me know it, but it led to teachable moments for us both. She was tired of hearing my ridiculous optimism and seeing the love in my eyes, and she tried to convince me that our mutual friend is not coming back. I heard her out, and then told her she does not know the future, nor do I, but I know who does. He will bring about what He is going to bring about, and I am content with that. We ended up loving one another more deeply than ever.
This season of bliss in my life comes during a time when the world seems to be falling apart, and I believe The LORD has given it to me as a gift. He is increasing my faith, and I am shouting it from the rooftops. That is one of the big reasons I have and maintain this blog. It allows me to express my joy and reread about all of the pearls He has scattered into my life. It allows me to hopefully communicate with people I love and those He graces with understanding.
UPDATE, October 26, 2023...
1 Added the link.
4 Added these descriptions of rarity.
UPDATE, October 28, 2023...
I was pleased to hear today one of my other coffee shop friends say they had read this post, and we had a nice discussion about it. In light of that, I am going to include some things here that I clarified with them.
The way I read the Bible...
A woman is bound to her husband as long as he lives. But if her husband dies, she is free to marry anyone she wishes, but he must belong to the Lord. (1 Corinthians 7:39 NIV)
Anyone who divorces his wife and marries another woman commits adultery, and the man who marries a divorced woman commits adultery. (Luke 16:18 NIV)
If we deliberately keep on sinning after we have received the knowledge of the truth, no sacrifice for sins is left, but only a fearful expectation of judgment and of raging fire that will consume the enemies of God. Anyone who rejected the law of Moses died without mercy on the testimony of two or three witnesses. How much more severely do you think someone deserves to be punished who has trampled the Son of God underfoot, who has treated as an unholy thing the blood of the covenant that sanctified them, and who has insulted the Spirit of grace? For we know him who said, “It is mine to avenge; I will repay,” and again, “The Lord will judge his people.” It is a dreadful thing to fall into the hands of the living God. (Hebrews 10:26-31 NIV)
For me to pursue more than friendship with a divorced woman would put me into the "deliberately sinning" category, and I will not go there. I won't risk putting her into that kind of situation either.
This is actually part of my job, and I'm having so much fun doing it. 😊
And, just to make sure there are no misunderstandings, there is nothing sinful about leaving a marriage if it is an abusive or bad situation.
Rather than get into all of that, I highly recommend people listen to David Pawson's lectures about Remarriage After Divorce. It is very loving and thorough, and you can find it at his website here.5
Those who find themselves remarried after divorce when they come to faith, or learn that it is wrong, can ask Jesus what to do about their specific situations. God desires mercy, not sacrifice. Repentance requires us to put right what can be put right, but we don't want to make things worse. Nobody can put right everything they have done wrong. Again, Jesus will guide us, if we ask him.
Getting ourselves right with God is the first place to start. If you have not read my Apprentice of Jesus post, please do. I believe it will point you in the right direction.
Blessings.
UPDATE, October 29, 2023...
3 Added this statement to explain the corny video.
Adjusted footnotes to keep the footnote subjects (red) in order.
Truly I tell you, unless you change and become like little children, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven. (Matthew 18:3 NIV)
...something I aspire to be like. My analytical, logical mind needs to have the faith of a child, which is what I try to do. She does this naturally.
Dan Burns from Dan in Real Life...
What is it? That it's frustrating that you can't be with this person? That, ..that, ..there's something keeping you apart? That there's something about this person you really connect with? [Cut to Marie overhearing this in the other room.] And whenever you're near this person, you don't know what to say, and you say everything that's in your mind and in your heart! And you know, that if you could just be together, that this person would help you become the best possible version of yourself!
Boneheads who make those kinds of criticisms are just exhibiting their own judgmental biases and programming, and are simply worth ignoring.
You will hear of wars and rumors of wars, but see to it that you are not alarmed. Such things must happen, but the end is still to come. (Matthew 24:6 NIV)
She helps me not be alarmed. 😊
7 ...while I desire to protect my friend and help her be successful. 😉
The Father has brought us together for His good and perfect reasons, and He does not make mistakes. He has us both strategically positioned and prepared. The Darkness has been trying to keep us apart, ...but it will ultimately fail.
Hence, my "ridiculous optimism." 🤣
UPDATE, November 10, 2023...
7 Added the additional statements.
UPDATE, November 20, 2023...
5 The link to the webpage with the audio files I listened to seems to be missing or broken. I am leaving it here in case it becomes available again.
Here is a link to Individual Messages about divorce and remarriage. I do not believe I have listened to these, but am sure the content is similar.
Here is a link to the webpage highlighting his book, Remarriage is Adultery Unless....
Adjusted footnotes to keep the footnote subjects (red) in order.
UPDATE, November 21, 2023...
2 Added the link.
Adjusted footnotes to keep the footnote subjects (red) in order.
UPDATE, February 18, 2024...
Sometimes it is necessary to be blunt and direct.
When I listened to David Pawson's lectures about Remarriage After Divorce, I made note of the Scripture references he discussed. I am going to list them here in the order he presented them. The "red letters" are the words attributed to Jesus.
Luke 16:18 Anyone who divorces his wife and marries another woman commits adultery, and the man who marries a divorced woman commits adultery. (Luke 16:18 NIV)
Mark 10:2-12 Some Pharisees came and tested him by asking, “Is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife?”
“What did Moses command you?” he replied.
They said, “Moses permitted a man to write a certificate of divorce and send her away.”
“It was because your hearts were hard that Moses wrote you this law,” Jesus replied. “But at the beginning of creation God ‘made them male and female.’ ‘For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh.’ So they are no longer two, but one flesh. Therefore what God has joined together, let no one separate.”
When they were in the house again, the disciples asked Jesus about this. He answered, “Anyone who divorces his wife and marries another woman commits adultery against her. And if she divorces her husband and marries another man, she commits adultery.” (Mark 10:2-12 NIV)
Matthew 5:31-32 It has been said, ‘Anyone who divorces his wife must give her a certificate of divorce.’ But I tell you that anyone who divorces his wife, except for sexual immorality, makes her the victim of adultery, and anyone who marries a divorced woman commits adultery. (Matthew 5:31-32 NIV 2011)
This is the "one exception," meaning Jesus uses words translated as: "except."
Here is the previous version of the NIV translation, which was the version Pawson used when he gave his lectures. (I would listen to confirm this, but that recording seems to be gone, as I stated, above.) ...
It has been said, ‘Anyone who divorces his wife must give her a certificate of divorce.’ But I tell you that anyone who divorces his wife, except for marital unfaithfulness, causes her to become an adulteress, and anyone who marries a divorced woman commits adultery. (Matthew 5:31-32 NIV 1984)
You can read other translations of the second part here: Matthew 5:32.
Pawson points out this "one exception" has been interpreted very widely by many to justify remarriage after divorce. Some Bible translations even seem to do this.
That current NIV version, above, is illogical. If the woman is being divorced because she sinned through "sexual immorality," how is she a "victim" of adultery? It does not make any sense. If he divorces her because he wants to commit sexual immorality himself, that is not an exception, it is simply his sinful behavior. In that case, she is a victim of his behavior, but that is not what Jesus is saying here and he is not giving her license to abandon her covenant with her husband just because he did.
These interpretations are not consistent with all of the other places in Scripture where Jesus plainly and clearly established his expectations.
That older NIV translation presumes the woman will remarry just to survive, and therefore be forced to live as an adulteress, and if she is being divorced because she had been unfaithful she would already be an adulteress. It is logically consistent.
Matthew 19:3-12 Some Pharisees came to him to test him. They asked, “Is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife for any and every reason?”
“Haven’t you read,” he replied, “that at the beginning the Creator ‘made them male and female,’ and said, ‘For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh’ So they are no longer two, but one flesh. Therefore what God has joined together, let no one separate.”
“Why then,” they asked, “did Moses command that a man give his wife a certificate of divorce and send her away?”
Jesus replied, “Moses permitted you to divorce your wives because your hearts were hard. But it was not this way from the beginning. I tell you that anyone who divorces his wife, except for sexual immorality, and marries another woman commits adultery.”
The disciples said to him, “If this is the situation between a husband and wife, it is better not to marry.”
Jesus replied, “Not everyone can accept this word, but only those to whom it has been given. For there are eunuchs who were born that way, and there are eunuchs who have been made eunuchs by others—and there are those who choose to live like eunuchs for the sake of the kingdom of heaven. The one who can accept this should accept it.” (Matthew 19:3-12 NIV)
This one also has the "exception," and the reason for the divorce is even more vague, but the part about marrying another woman is definite. It is called polygamy. Pawson calls remarriage after divorce "consecutive polygamy." As many spouses as you like, just one at at time.
Paul said these things about the topic...
Romans 7:1-3 Do you not know, brothers and sisters—for I am speaking to those who know the law—that the law has authority over someone only as long as that person lives? For example, by law a married woman is bound to her husband as long as he is alive, but if her husband dies, she is released from the law that binds her to him. So then, if she has sexual relations with another man while her husband is still alive, she is called an adulteress. But if her husband dies, she is released from that law and is not an adulteress if she marries another man. (Romans 7:1-3 NIV)
1 Corinthians 7:39 A woman is bound to her husband as long as he lives. But if her husband dies, she is free to marry anyone she wishes, but he must belong to the Lord. (1 Corinthians 7:39 NIV)
1 Corinthians 7:10-11 To the married I give this command (not I, but the Lord): A wife must not separate from her husband. But if she does, she must remain unmarried or else be reconciled to her husband. And a husband must not divorce his wife. (1 Corinthians 7:10-11 NIV)
He also said these things, which are related...
1 Corinthians 7:12-16 To the rest I say this (I, not the Lord): If any brother has a wife who is not a believer and she is willing to live with him, he must not divorce her. And if a woman has a husband who is not a believer and he is willing to live with her, she must not divorce him. For the unbelieving husband has been sanctified through his wife, and the unbelieving wife has been sanctified through her believing husband. Otherwise your children would be unclean, but as it is, they are holy.
But if the unbeliever leaves, let it be so. The brother or the sister is not bound in such circumstances; God has called us to live in peace. How do you know, wife, whether you will save your husband? Or, how do you know, husband, whether you will save your wife? (1 Corinthians 7:12-16 NIV)
1 Corinthians 7:28 But if you do marry, you have not sinned; and if a virgin marries, she has not sinned. But those who marry will face many troubles in this life, and I want to spare you this. (1 Corinthians 7:28 NIV)
I am nobody's judge; Jesus is the judge, and these are his criteria.
If people ignore these words, they risk standing before Jesus in defiance of him.
If I know about these teachings, yet say nothing to those those who flaunt them while claiming to follow Jesus, then I risk his condemnation for not doing my job.
Jesus does not want to make us happy. He wants to save us from our sins.
To be saved, we must repent and be holy. There are no "tickets to heaven."
"Marriage licenses," and their corresponding divorce proceedings, are Sea Jurisdiction, legal contracts and have nothing to do with biblical, Land-Jurisdiction marriages. I discussed this in the December 5, 2022 update of my Submission post.
UPDATE, February 19, 2024...
Encouraging a lamb to wander the hills is cruel.
Pulchritude is fleeting.
If you always do what you always did, you will always get what you always got.
We believe those we do not know, and hate those who love us.
If a blind woman leads a blind woman, both will end up in the ditch.
Those who claim to know will be held to account.
Those who believe the ones they trust are innocent.
Love always trusts.
Presuming to know without investigating the facts leads to error.
A butterfly is beautiful in its season, but dies alone.
Cultivating deep relationships and then abandoning them is cruel.
Yearning for the ideal in an imperfect world leads to discouragement.
The answer is right in front of you.
These things are common sense.
UPDATE, March 31, 2024...
The Spirit has counseled me more about this situation.
She had spent most of her life in relatively populated areas, which meant she was always around a lot of people. Now she is living in a relatively rural area, which means the number of people she has to deal with are far fewer. She can give them the love she longs to give without being overwhelmed herself. This is obviously a good thing.
She worked out the "contract" she had made with God by staying in Midland the two years she had planned in order to learn what she needed to learn. Then she got to escape to the solitude of her dreams. That is why she was always talking about it.
She has also met a man she wants to marry, and I am glad. Part of my concern for her had been she was living in the world as a lone woman, and given what I know about what is going on in the world, in general, it concerned me, but I was confident God was watching out for her, and it looks like he has. She needs a man to love and protect her.
She deserves to be happy.
I now believe God did not actually want her to know what I know about remarriage after divorce. Jesus is the only one who actually lived a perfect life. We can't, so he did it for us.
During the past year of fishing, the Spirit taught me more about all of this...
Nobody has lived a perfect life, except Yehoshua. We all make mistakes and have sinned in the past. What matters is going forward.
Commitment is what matters.
Recent behavior is what matters, not wrong choices of the distant past.
We must be equally yoked in order to be able to work together.
God is the one who decides what is acceptable to Him.
A desire to hear Him must come before we will actually, truly hear Him.
Following his lead is what matters.
Only God's opinion counts.
Twenty-nine (29) years of marriage sure looks like commitment to me. So is thirty-eight (38).
UPDATE, April 11, 2025...
He desires mercy, not sacrifice.
UPDATE, June 29, 2025...
I learned another lesson yesterday. I was wearing the orange shirt I had on at Neptune Beach and think I might have gotten rid of another burden.
I do not get on Facebook (FB) often, but there are occasional notifications and I check them out. While doing that last week, I saw a "You might know" prompt from the system pointing at the account of my Seventh-Grade admirer, the one I mentioned at the top of this post.
We had not spoken in decades, and I was strongly prompted to send a friend request. Most people do not typically get on FB a lot so I did not expect an immediate response, or even a response at all.
On Friday, however, while I was in the coffee shop, I got a FB Messenger text from her. We had a fun, long-distance conversation and caught up on things. In the end, we agreed God is good. It was very nice.
Yesterday (Saturday), I was thinking about this and realized a burden had been lifted from me. That conversation was closure from my perspective.
I was thirteen (13) years old when I experienced her advances and I did not know what to do with it. She was the same age. Girls tend to develop sooner than boys and I'm sure she was being affected by her raging hormones, just like me. I was introverted and she was obviously extroverted.
In our text discussion, she mentioned that my FB profile picture looked like I did when we were both in Third Grade (9 years old) and in a swimming class together. I have my Fourth-Grade photo on there because I want to remind myself to have the faith of a child. She said that we sat next to each other during that swimming class. Our family names are very close, alphabetically.
Just like my "second love" (above) caused me some butterflies as we wrote,"I will not talk in class," on the chalkboard after school, I apparently caught her eye. I vaguely remember the swimming class and believe it was the one I failed because I would not get into the deep end of the pool. (A year later I jumped off the diving board during the first session and I ended up taking the entire series of lessons, including Junior Lifesaving. I liked swimming so much that I was on the school swim team in Ninth Grade when I was 15 years old.)
The lesson I learned yesterday is my childhood admirer is probably ENTP, one of my natural partners. That's why she came after me, like the ghost did last Fall. So, it turns out I have encountered three (3) women like that in my life. Although I was not ready for it at 13, I love it now. What was a dark chapter for me at the time is now gone, 54 (5 + 4 --> 9) years later.
I had told my admirer a long time ago that I forgave her, and I did, but apparently the trauma was still there. It's gone now!! Yayy!!!
I love how God knows exactly what I need, exactly when I need it. I so look forward to where He is taking me.
Now, if that Ghost would just come back. Patience, Rick. Patience.
UPDATE, July 10, 2025...
Well, so much for estimating personality types. LOL
My childhood admirer just told me she is INFJ-T. So much for my estimation skills! Yes, she is introverted; it just seemed like extroversion to me at the time!!
We're both Introverted/iNtuitive. Makes sense.
It's always best to have actual data, which is why I encourage people to explore their type and share the results with me. I'm having so much fun getting to know people!!
My mind is continually piecing "the puzzle" together. Automatically.
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