Knowledge and wisdom about Twin Flames (TF) started to appear in my life before I knew I had one but after I had met her.
It came in the form of videos shared by friends. Later, it came in the form of articles from the woman I currently work for, which loudly and astonishingly confirmed what I had already concluded on my own.
After my Twin left me I exclaimed to ADONAI , "Why have you done this to me?!"
He is faithful and explained in good time.
One thing the TF information taught me is I must become sovereign. I must not be co-dependent. I know my Twin would not put up with co-dependency; she is already sovereign. That is one of the things I cherish about her.
My wife was a nurturer and she nurtured me. She cooked for me, did my laundry and cut my hair, all within a few weeks of the beginning of our cohabitation. I loved it.
As we grew together and learned biblical principles of marriage, we conformed to the biblical model and took on our biblical roles. That was a good thing. God's ways are best.
But we were co-dependent, at least I was.
I let her run her household. She was an excellent shopper and I was an excellent provider. When I was home from work she took care of my needs.
And I got lazy.
She did the things I did not like to do. I relinquished management of the bank account and its related bookkeeping to her because she did all the spending. She did the laundry and the cleaning. She painted the walls and did the decorating. She planned family gatherings and arranged for the Thanksgiving feast. Christmas decorations were her thing.
I appreciated everything she did, and she appreciated what I did, too. I mowed the grass, etc. You know, guy stuff.
Then she died.
The first thing I had to deal with the following day was a broken 2.5 quart casserole dish showing up on my doorstep. We never seemed to have problems like that, but I certainly did right at the apex of my heartbreak. I took photos of the packing material mess, figured out how to return it to WalMart, although she had ordered it through Amazon, and eventually confirmed her account had been credited.
I had to learn how to pay the bills and saw she had always done a very good job. No errors.
I had to learn how to cook and used her recipes as she had modified them.
I had to cancel her credit cards and empty her purse. There were no surprises.
Six months after her departure, I began learning about my sovereign heritage as an American and pursued my Cooler Hat. That took me into The Michigan Assembly where I have learned about personal and public sovereignty.
I have been a widow going on six years and I am comfortable in my sovereignty now. I do not need anybody else. I am not a burden. I can do as I please, when I please.
I have been "nesting." I bought and installed a new garage door opener because the old one failed. I had a new furnace and air conditioner installed because the old one failed. I bought a new computer and monitor because I was afraid the old one was failing. I am an INTJ and I don't fix things if they are not broken. LOL
Last week, I awoke to water leaking out the back of my refrigerator. My deceased wife's stuff in the basement beneath it was getting wet. Fortunately, most of it was in waterproof bins, as was her practice. After getting that situation stabilized, I went for my morning walk and realized it was a good opportunity to ask my daughters if they would like to help me sort through their mother's things. They still live locally but have effectively ghosted me since their mother died.
I texted them and my sister with a cheerful invitation, but they simply left the conversation. As my sister pointed out, they were given notice.
So, I have begun sorting through my wife's stuff. Again. I had some emotions, but largely I'm over it. (There were a few tears over her long, black, fuzzy robe.) It's time to let others use things that still have value.
I watched the things that do not have value go into the garbage truck and realized at that moment those things are not my wife. They never were.
Separability. Sovereignty. I am ready now.
My Twin would not want to see or deal with that stuff, nor would I.
The hard work I became aware of when I wrote my Possessions post back in 2021 has been recommenced. My motivation is my Twin. She won't be back until I get this stuff taken care of.
I am still fascinated by my "New York friend" (Submission post, September 24, 2023 update) and continue to follow her blog. She lives a form of sovereignty I admire. I dream about possibilities.
All Glory to God.